This is the text of the query letter I’m planning on sending out to agents. If anything doesn’t ring true, seems forced, or could benefit from more consideration, I’d be mighty grateful if you’d let me know in the comments.

UPDATE of 10/26: A reference to this site will be included in the query letter, along with a call-to-action to visit.

“17-year-old Abigail Moore, apprentice witch, is collecting herbs along the New Arkady shoreline when she stumbles over a young man, insensible, cotton shirt, trousers, and jacket waterlogged and cold to the touch. As Abigail pulls the young man’s arm over her shoulder, she sets into motion a chain of events that will see her driven out of her cottage, pursued by musket-toting Royalist soldiers, ululating toad-people and (most dogged of all) doubts about herself.

Will Abigail choose the virginity the path of witchcraft requires? Or will Abigail allow herself to be drawn into the revolution breaking out around her?

Inspired by authors like Diana Wynne Jones and H.P. Lovecraft, the original “Star Wars” film, and video games like the Fable series, “The Witch of the Colonies” might be described as ‘girl Harry Potter meets steampunk Huck Finn in serial format,’ but only if I was desperate to get the idea across as quickly as possible. “Witch of the Colonies” will serve as the first novel in an ongoing series, followed by “Demon of the Colonies” (a work in progress.)

Per your request, I have attached the first 10 pages of my manuscript, currently weighing in at 82,000 words. Thanks in advance for the time.

I look forward to hearing from you.”

Thanks, oh curious readers!

Designing the two races of sentient non-humans in Northern Arcadia has been a real challenge, and the source of many manuscript revisions.

The ‘ssssla’ described in the earliest manuscript drafts as ‘fish-people’ have drifted into ‘frog’ territory, and will ultimately owe much of their appearance to the family of American toads. I’m also leaning towards replacing ‘ssssla’ with ‘dhao bo’; I’m hard pressed to imagine sentient toads picking a name for themselves with all those stray sibilants.

Designing the race of ape people, the ghuba, has posed different challenges. More on that tomorrow.

Saturday: Identify final SIX Tier 1 agents. Document agent requirements.
Sunday: Print/pull together necessary documents.
Monday: Mail first THREE Tier 1 agents. Provide 1 week exclusivity window.
+1 week: Mail second THREE Tier 1 agents. Provide 1 week exclusivity window.
+2 weeks: Identify new tier of agents, rinse, repeat.