Dear J,

I’ve never had a deluxe toilet in the house. I suspect it’s like pricey underwear and premium toilet paper: it starts off feeling like a luxury, then way too quickly becomes a necessity. Paul and I have managed to survive until now without a joystick-controlled bidet patrolling the toilet bowl. We’ll be sticking to economy commodes for the foreseeable future.

For me, the real temptation to spend lots of cash arrived in the form of ceramic flooring. I have spent hours poring over tile; at two AM the other night, I came across this stuff and I wanted to dance. The design plays with the same circles and rectangles motif that we’re using in Paul’s office (which is adjacent to the bathroom.) The tile synchs up perfectly with the pretentious black square in the kitchen floor (which is adjacent to Paul’s office.) Frickin’ gorgeous and perfectly aligned with our creative direction. If this tile has a downside, it’s that it looks too good.

Well, that, and it’s $36.50 a square foot. The bathroom we’re focusing on is 64 square feet. A 10% margin puts us at 70 square feet. 70 times $36.50 is a staggering figure for the tile alone in a half bath/laundry room.

The last clause in the previous sentence is why I’ve moved on with a mostly untroubled heart from the perfect and pricey tile that makes me want to dance even now. This space won’t be, uh, privy to as many intimate scenes as the two full bathrooms in the house. Laundry isn’t glamorous, or sexy. Well. Not when I’m doing it, and since Paul never does…

We’ve already identified an industrial-looking floor tile, very cool in a modern way, dark, retailing at $6 a square foot. Also a white vanity, simple chrome fixtures, circular mirror, and chrome over-vanity lights. All reasonably priced, and with a few touches (candle and hand towels on the vanity, basket near toilet full of magazines and comics, colorful print over the toilet) I think when we finish it’ll be fun and functional.

I enjoy this interior design stuff lots more than I anticipated going into the home buying process. Enough that I’m seriously considering learning how to do reupholstering work, which I think would also require learning how to sew… but that might be okay! Something to tackle after we’ve moved in (and a possible revenue stream in a year or so?)

I can’t do anything about the decay of the rule of law in the US, or the corruption of our federal government. Glib as I am, I can’t convince nut job evangelicals of any denomination to stop trying to make the whole apocalypse thing happen. I occupy a position of safety, comfort and privilege, but in a larger sense I feel helpless about a national trajectory that seems pointed downward.

Creating the interior design for this condo, our sanctuary, has given me comfort during these past few, rather gray, months. I figure, nation wide, things will most likely get worse before they get better.

It’s a good time to be building a shelter from the storm.

::hugs:: and much love,

C/

Dear J,

Loan approved. We’re on track to close on the 27th of February, and move to Our First Condo four weeks later.

Love!

C/

ps My interior monologue after getting the news…

Okay, next steps?

Schedule movers, sign paperwork with our contractor, order Paul’s office chair and adjustable height desk as well as an adjustable bed frame (sleep apnea) and mattress. Moving boxes arrived a couple days ago: I’ll start packing tomorrow. I can go ahead, pick up a bunch of stuff I’ve been scoping out at a thrift store. End tables, a chest for the foot of our bed, that kinda thing. There’s a wingback chair for $85 that needs reupholstering. Should I buy it? I need to figure out what gaps we have in our cookware for the menu we want to serve. Fast food locations won’t be quite so accessible… and the kitchen we’re inheriting is too fancy not to use.

Wait, more urgent, contractors need us to pick out and procure a toilet, vanity, medicine cabinet, upright washer/dryer, and tile for the bathroom floor. Also a new barn door for Paul’s office. Speaking of Paul, to protect his gaming table, we’ll need a table pad and tablecloth… should we try sourcing that from a thrift store? Make that one a medium priority.

The sellers are gifting us at least one beautiful piece of furniture, possibly more. We’ll finalize our list of furniture purchases after closing. Paul and I agreed on navy blue paint for the den walls, dark green for the master bedroom (creative concept “Parrots Escape”) and peach for the guest bedroom (creative concept “Tangerine Dreamland”). White trim, doors and windows throughout the apartment; ivory is default for walls in kitchen, living room, hall and office.

New artwork (framed Audubon Heron for den, one of Takashi Murakami’s Superflat Method prints on canvas for guest bedroom) and bedding (coverlets, sheets, blankets) already purchased and headed to us. We sent a full trash can of books off to be recycled. We have a collection of video games and movies we want to donate to charity, but need to identify the charity and logistics. Note to self: not an urgent priority. More urgent is getting new towels in the house palette, so we can have them washed and ready for use on move-in day.

Eek! Plants! Need to research cat-safe plants that could flourish in this space. Den, kitchen, bedrooms all viable possibilities. We need a new cat tower for Paul’s office, and possibly a second stainless steel water fountain. A tray for Penny’s food dish, to catch her crumbs. Everyone’s a messy eater in this house. Aw, man… place mats! Can’t forget place mats! Cloth napkins suck but are eco-friendly. So… napkin rings, too?

I haven’t had much luck finding lamps in my rambles through vintage and secondhand shops; I may resort to ordering lighting online. We need a new 6′ round rug for Paul’s office, and a thick and comfy rug for the den floor. Possibly a runner for the hallway. A Waterhog floor mat for the entry. Also a coatrack. Possibly a seat for old folks while they unlace winter boots. We’re going to hope the sellers leave behind their window treatments; for now, the dark velvet curtains of my dreams, pooling on the floor? Their future is… up in the air.

For sure I will be purchasing multiple faux fur throws for the den and bedrooms; I need a little naughty to balance that big boy naval blue and dark green. I refuse to put out more than one decorative pillow per bed slash seat; pillows can wait until the second week of March.

On March 1st, I’ll need to contact all our service providers and arrange for service at the new place starting the 3rd week of March. I want a professional cleaning service to give the new place a going over before we move in.

I want to buy that wingback chair for $85 and reupholster the thing with bright yellow velvet. But is that the right chair for the den? Or should we invest in a good quality imitation Eames chair?

Need to change locks a few days after contractor finishes. A couple days before move in, need to fully provision kitchen.

What am I forgetting? WHAT AM I FORGETTING?